Hot on the heels of yesterday’s excellent piece of product naming, I have some advice for Woolworths. If you’re reducing the price of something, make sure it’s actually a reduction. “Was £1.25, now £1.99” didn’t strike me as an unmissable deal.

I spotted this sign in a branch of Budgens in Ealing. Presumably it’s the management’s take on diplomacy.

What it says: “Would customers please refrain from reading newspapers and magazines in the store as this can cause congestion for other shoppers.”

What they really mean: “If you’re not buying, clear off.”

I think this sign in Reading station says more about British trains than the author intended.

This must be one of the few places in the world where rail services get altered “due to engineering works not taking place”.

I’m sure they could have phrased it better. “Engineering works cancelled – services running as normal” would probably have covered it.